razor sharp

You know how when you are in the shower, time seems to stand still? Sometimes, you forget if you just put shampoo or conditioner in your hair. Sometimes you close your eyes and enjoy the feeling of hot water pounding against your hair. And you have no idea how long you just stood there pretending you were underneath a tropical waterfall (with warm water? hey, it's my daydream, step off) and forgetting how exhausted you are and how the coffee hasn't hit your bloodstream yet.

And then you hear the baby babbling over the monitor and she has now woken up and is yelling for daddy to get her out of the crib and Give! Her! The! Milk Cup! And you are trying to open the shower door and yell downstairs for Brian to stop eating cereal and get the baby. And then you jump out realizing this semi-relaxing moment has now made you 10 minutes late.

And then you get to work and go to scratch your leg and cannot figure out why it feels like you are scratching a cactus bush. And then you realize you only shaved one leg. So you spend the rest of the day paranoid that everyone can see the stubbly hair on your left leg and that there might somehow become a moment when it would be appropriate or necessary for your coworker to touch your leg and then they will be totally disgusted and spread office gossip that you lack basic personal hygiene.

Yeah. That sucks.